The Fucking Ghost Writer

Is it my imag­i­na­tion, or were sev­er­al instances of the word “fuck” dubbed with the word “shit” in The Ghost Writer?

I think I even saw Pierce Brosnan’s adjec­ti­val “fuck­ing” dubbed over with “sod­ding.”

The Abyss

You might remem­ber this 1989 James Cameron movie.

Yeah that one. I caught up with it about halfway through last night, and I don’t think I’d seen it in maybe a dozen years. I remem­ber hav­ing want­ed to like it as a kid, as I was into stuff like aliens and Atlantis, but I also remem­ber feel­ing as though the under­wa­ter intel­li­gences were hard­ly empha­sized, almost as an after­thought, and that the main plot revolved around some bor­ing adult dra­ma stuff blah blah Cold War. And also that the end­ing was hor­ri­bly unsat­is­fy­ing.

Man, I was right, espe­cial­ly about the end­ing. Okay so the final plot point is that Ed Har­ris needs to go like four miles deep­er than their sub­ma­rine already is, by him­self, in just a div­ing suit whose hel­met won’t implode because it’s filled with pink breath­ing flu­id instead of air. They claim that it’s sim­i­lar to the stuff you breathed “for nine months” in the womb, but I thought oxy­gen was sup­plied by the umbil­i­cal cord? At any rate, down he goes, until he’s greet­ed by one of these non-ter­res­tri­al intel­li­gences who just kind of glows and blinks at him for a while before tak­ing his hand and lead­ing him to this grand under­wa­ter city.

Ear­li­er we had seen what we assumed to be a ship belong­ing to these guys, though it was flu­id and seem­ing­ly bio­lu­mi­nes­cent. One of the crew had sug­gest­ed that “their whole tech­nol­o­gy” is based on manip­u­lat­ing water, so okay, I can sus­pend belief enough for that, it’s a cool idea any­way. So as Ed Har­ris and this alien are careen­ing through this under­wa­ter city we imag­ine, Okay, maybe these sky­scraper-like struc­tures are made of water, whether they freeze it or oth­er­wise fix it mol­e­c­u­lar­ly by ion­iz­ing it or some­thing?, look, I’m not a chemist.

Con­tin­ue →

That drunk Russian space pig thing

Pervye na Lune

Click the image for the full pho­to mon­tage.

I first encoun­tered this last year on WFMU’s blog, and despite being curi­ous of its ori­gins, the inter­net has trained me to accept con­tent with­out con­text. Fun­ny pic­tures, drunk pig, pass it on. Nei­ther the WFMU post, nor the blog they got it from even ask where this came from. But who cares — find it, blog about it, Digg it, make a YTMND about it, a YouTube spin­off, and move on to the next meme.

But there’s some­thing clear­ly artis­tic about these images. They’re too per­fect. And they depict such a car­i­ca­tured past that you sus­pect they may have been tak­en recent­ly. And, as not­ed in the com­ments that I didn’t both­er to read until today, they were.

First on the Moon poster

They’re stills from a 2005 Russ­ian mock­u­men­tary called Per­vye na lune, or First on the Moon, which actu­al­ly looks good, its premise approach­ing what you might have expect­ed if you spec­u­lat­ed enough about the intent of those pho­tos. From the film’s offi­cial site, as trans­lat­ed by Google:

You can argue long, the Amer­i­cans were on the Moon or not, but there are facts that prove con­vinc­ing­ly : Sovi­et sci­en­tists were able to run the first air­craft into space as ear­ly as March 1938. Infor­ma­tion more than con­vinc­ing, and at this time Russ­ian cos­mo­nauts ahead of the Amer­i­cans …

It’s not on Net­flix yet, but I hear it’s on Kara­gar­ga, the invite-only avant-garde film tor­rent track­er, which means it may soon make it to art tor­rents or gpod. There are also sev­er­al copies on eBay, but I can’t be sure they have sub­ti­tles, or are even com­pat­i­ble with Amer­i­can DVD play­ers.

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