Cinematic Titanic is a complete hoax

Only TWO days ago, cinematictitanic.com mys­te­ri­ous­ly appeared. Claimed to be authored by Joel Hodg­son, it goes on to say that he is return­ing to the mak­ing-fun-of-movies thing, along with Trace, Frank, Mary Jo, and JOSH WEINSTEIN. So I think some healthy skep­ti­cism wouldn’t be UNfound­ed.

Nev­er­the­less, Slash­dot, Ain’t It Cool News, and doubt­less thou­sands of oth­er blogs are blow­ing up about it, and nobody’s ask­ing any ques­tions. Just fawn­ing, ejac­u­la­to­ry cheer­ings-on.

The first thing you notice is how POORLY the page is designed. You even see a <meta name=“author” content=“John Stotler” /> in the source, that the domain is host­ed at GoDad­dy, and is reg­is­tered through a pri­va­cy proxy. Okay, fine, so these peo­ple have hired an ama­teur design­er. It’s pos­si­ble.

But the announce­ment just resem­bles too close­ly every MST3K fan’s wet dream. They’re an easy tar­get for a prank like this. They’ve been chant­i­ng Joel’s name con­tin­u­al­ly for over ten years now, beg­ging for him to come back. Pulling one over on peo­ple demon­strat­ing such obnox­ious behav­ior would be fun­ny. What if it even made it on Slash­dot? Or Wikipedia???

Besides the fact that it would be weird for all five of these peo­ple to be simul­ta­ne­ous­ly inspired to beat that dead horse, Joel left the show because he want­ed to dis­tance him­self from it. In a press release from 1993 he said,

It’s time for me to hang up my red jump suit and move behind the cam­era. Besides, there’s an old show busi­ness adage I once heard Adam West say: “Stay in the same cos­tume and before you know it, you end up sign­ing pic­tures at an R.V. show.” Maybe it was Clay­ton Moore, now that I think of it.

I want to become a behind-the-cam­era guy. I want to get on to the NEXT weird show. I want to be an idea man.

The new site itself is ugly, yes, but more than that, it’s very un-Joel-like through and through. Joel’s a smart, cre­ative, fun­ny guy. Would he real­ly put his name behind such a stale, mean­ing­less name as “Cin­e­mat­ic Titan­ic”? With this logo?:

Cinematic Titanic

Would he real­ly say, “Our first release is at this time a total secret, how­ev­er – I’m will­ing to say it makes ‘Manos the Hands of Fate’ look like ‘San­ta Claus Con­quers the Mar­tians’ in a car wreck with ‘Eegah!’”? These are the words of a fan, nam­ing his favorite episodes, not the words of a guy who want­ed to move on with his life, four­teen years ago.

The site also reads, “I’ve just been inter­viewed by Lucas­film online, in antic­i­pa­tion of Cin­e­mat­ic Titanic’s first live show and world pre­miere in San Fran­cis­co in Decem­ber.” Lucas­film online? Why haven’t they been talk­ing about this? Wouldn’t an exclu­sive, rare inter­view with Joel Hodg­son about his new project be some­thing you might want to men­tion? Where in San Fran­cis­co is this pre­mier? Why haven’t I got­ten a con­fir­ma­tion email for sign­ing up for the mail­ing list?

MST3K Torrents: Specimen Jackpot!

A cou­ple years ago I toyed with eDon­key and the Dig­i­tal Archive Project as a means to col­lect­ing MST3K episodes. Turns out eDon­key is wide­ly and right­ly regard­ed to be a ter­ri­ble piece of soft­ware, and the episodes weren’t well-seed­ed, so that went nowhere, and I opt­ed to rip a low-qual­i­ty Shout­Cast chan­nel for a cou­ple dozen episodes.

Today, remind­ed of DAP by this com­ment at Life­hack­er, and aid­ed by a search on Demonoid.com, I was led to this page at The Pirate Bay, with links to tor­rents for every known avail­able episode, all high-qual­i­ty and all fair­ly well-seed­ed.

MST128K

Talk to JOEL!My life in the past few days has been over­tak­en by MST3K. I dis­cov­ered that there’s a video ver­sion of Winamp’s Shout­Cast, with some chan­nels stream­ing tv shows 24 hours a day. Two of these chan­nels stream MST3K, and though the streams are usu­al­ly maxed out on view­ers, for $4 my IP is on the VIP list of this stream, which means unin­ter­rupt­ed MST3K until March 31.

When a KTMA-era mini-marathon was sched­uled last week­end, I knew I had to “tape” it. I prob­a­bly could have guessed that these episodes are read­i­ly avail­able via var­i­ous p2p out­lets, but I also would have guessed (right­ly) that the files are kept extreme­ly large for the sake of qual­i­ty. Ide­al­ly I want­ed to save video from the stream in very low qual­i­ty; near­ly all of an MST3K episode is sil­hou­ettes and bad movies any­way, so this could hard­ly be con­sid­ered “com­pro­mise.”

Con­tin­ue →

Firefox, video, MST3K

Joel

I still don’t get why Fire­fox is bet­ter and more pop­u­lar than Mozil­la ever was, but okay, I’ll play along. Espe­cial­ly giv­en these enhance­ments:

  • Cook­ie But­ton: one of the best fea­tures of Mozil­la that inex­plic­a­bly didn’t make it to Fire­fox.
  • Flash­block: Only see Flash when you want to! This is a mir­a­cle.

Final­ly found a video play­er to be hap­py with: Media Play­er Clas­sic. It’s also bun­dled with Real Alter­na­tive, which allows you to play Real for­mat files with­out rely­ing on the night­mar­ish RealOne play­er. This week I also dis­cov­ered Net Trans­port, which does the best (i.e., quick­est, eas­i­est, and most free) job of sav­ing stream­ing video I’ve seen so far. And final­ly, MST3K is still kick­ing: there’s this gigan­tic ref­er­ence site, the still-exis­tent info club, and a legal­ly ambigu­ous Shout­Cast video stream. Shh­h­h­h­h­hh.